Pet Raccoon Gets High, Has to Sleep it Off

Look, I love raccoons. Even I know that I shouldn't have one as a pet, though. They're kind of dicks. I once saw a raccoon pickpocket an employee at a zoo. Like, they don't give a F**K and usually have their middle finger to the law of nature. So, yeah...I love raccoons. But they're jerks. 

Anyway, this pet raccoon in Indianapolis got into his owner's weed stash and ended up-you guessed it-stoned. I'm assuming he ATE it because raccoons will eat anything. Unless this woman was blowing smoke directly into the face of the raccoon. I dunno. 


According to local NBC affiliate WTHR, the woman, realizing that her domesticated raccoon was a little more lethargic than usual, frantically tried to get some help. Instead of alerting the local vet or whatever, she went down to the fire department at 2AM and started ringing the doorbell. When they opened up, they found the woman and her pet raccoon, blazed as hell, exhibiting symptoms of someone who's "been exposed to marijuana," Wayne Township Fire Capt. Mike Pruitt said.

"The raccoon was very lethargic," Pruitt told ABC affiliate RTV6. "She started explaining what had happened. There wasn’t really much we could do, it was just the sort of thing that was going to take time."

So, basically, the raccoon had to sleep it off. I'm waiting for the followup story about what the raccoon ate while in his state and whether or not he declared, "Never again." Read more HERE!

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