Songs That Are Not Romantic

posted by Robin - 

Happy Valentine's Day. If you celebrate, I hope things go well. If you don't celebrate, happy Wednesday! 

I wanna do some love songs today, but first...I want to show you all of these songs because they are not love songs. Now, maybe you have a funny relationship and a song about a stalker is your JAM. If you are looking for a song to play at your wedding in complete seriousness...these will not work.

When I mentioned a stalker, you know I was talking about "Every Breath You Take," right? Because that ish is about stalking a woman. I recall Sting even saying that couple should not play The Police hit at weddings.

Lemme tell you how I learned what Pearl Jam's "Better Man" was all about. Long ago, I had set an old boyfriend's ringtone to the song. He, being a Pearl Jam fan, explained that, "Nooooo! That song is not about love." He was right. It's about settling for someone who really doesn't attempt to have a strong relationship. Yay!

R.E.M.'s "The One I Love" is sad. It's basically a manipulative relationship and being "a simple prop to occupy my time." Oof. Also, there are only like 23 words in this song. 

"Careless Whisper" from Wham? Also sad. I mean, "guilty feet have got no rhythm" is a bummer when you think about what could stem from that guilt. Fantastic saxophone, though. 

U2's "One" is a great song (all of these are, really), but I don't know if it's actually a love song. I always assumed it was about attempting world peace or something because, I mean...this is Bono we're talking about.

Via SongFacts:

This song can be interpreted many ways. Bono, who wrote the lyrics, has always been a bit vague, saying it is "about relationships." Here are some interpretations:
1) The song could relate to reunification of Germany, where the band recorded it.

2) It could be about the dissolution of The Edge's marriage to Aislinn O'Sullivan. The couple was having problems in their relationship and split soon after the sessions. Bono was the best man at their wedding.

3) It could be about the band putting their differences aside and coming together to make the album.

4) Bono may have been writing about his good friend, the Irish painter Guggi, who was having girl trouble.

5) The song could represent a conversation between an AIDS victim and his father.

Geeeeeezussssss.

No matter what version you prefer of "Tainted Love," it's pretty obvious that this isn't a song about a healthy relationship. There's the most well known version from Soft Cell, the Marilyn Manson cover, and the original from Gloria Jones. Each version is all about a toxic relationship. 

Robin Jones

Robin Jones

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